Friday, November 7, 2008

Trophy Vice Goes Home

Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska has reached out to President-elect Obama's transition team to indicate her interest in being named "ambassador to the nation of Africa," the governor confirmed today.

Gov. Palin said that although she had planned to continue in her position in Anchorage, she was willing to leave the governorship "because Africa is just such a darned important country."

Andy Borowitz, The Borowitz Report


Nine weeks ago, Caribou Barbie flew down to the lower 48 to effectively destroy any hopes John McCain may have once had of being President of the United States.

Someone in McCain's campaign, perhaps even Johnnie Mac himself, thought it would be an excellent idea, now that Hillary was out of the picture, to produce a woman for the important position of vice-president. This is, of course, an honorable thing to do. Women, after all, make up more than 50% of the nation's population and, to date, haven't been represented by one of their own even once as one of the top two ranking individuals of the executive branch.

0-91 is a pretty crappy record for women in the White House.

Anyhoo, the Johnnie Mac Shack decided that a woman would be a good idea. There are lots and lots of excellent & highly qualified female Republicans who would be a top-notch asset to a McCain candidacy and a McCain administration.

All but five of the nation's vice-presidents have served in congress or as a senator or governor, so going with that, there are dozens of great choices. Snowe (ME), Hutchinson (TX), Musgrave (CO), Moore-Capito (WV), Lingle (HI), Rell (CT). All are smart and experienced women who would, if necessary, be satisfactory presidents.

But then there's the little known governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin. Elected in November 2006, Palin was, prior to being governor, the mayor of Wasilla, AK (pop. 6600), and served on an energy board. She had been out of the United States (not including the neighboring Yukon Territory of Canada) once. She attended four different colleges as an undergraduate, finally graduating in 1987 with a communications major from the University of Idaho.

So, after spending a dozen or more months slamming Barack Obama, the man who would become the Democratic candidate for president, on his experience in relation to qualifying for the top job, the McCain campaign rolls out Sarah Palin to the collective, slack-jawed American electorate.

They tried to paint her as the everyday "hockey-mom" from a small state who would ostensibly represent the average joe. She was way over on the far right of issues involving religion and women's rights, and gun ownership and all that. The problem, as it turned out, was that she...well...isn't very bright when it comes to complex domestic and international issues regarding the safety and security of this nation.

During the few times she was allowed to talk to the media, she said jaw-droppingly stupid things. She didn't understand civics, she didn't understand geography or international diplomacy, she made startlingly inane statements regarding Russia, the job of the vice-president, and on and on. She was punk'd by a couple of morning radio jocks in Montréal who called her up and convinced her that she was talking to Nicolas Sarkozy, the president of France. From a $150,000 wardrobe (more than the average family spends on clothing in 80 years), to revelations that the Alaskan governor was, perhaps, just as ignorant as she led on, the McCain campaign became overwhelmed with damage-control.

In the end, of course, McCain lost, and he lost big. Today, three full days after the election, the campaign is boisterously blaming Palin for killing the campaign.

So who's fault is that? Palin's?

I think not.

Sarah Palin is Sarah Palin, for better or for worse. It was the job of John McCain and his campaign to properly vet and pre-qualify a potential vice-presidential candidate prior to that candidate being rolled out. The campaign should know, inside and out, without any doubt, what that candidate is all about. It should know exactly what the candidate knows, her background, what she's said, whether he or she has been unfaithful to their spouse, whether they've done drugs, if there are any "sex-tapes" floating around. All of these things have to be uncovered BEFORE the candidate is chosen and unveiled to the electorate.

So to all of the McCain/Palin staffers who are out there flinging mud at Sarah Palin: It's not her fault that she is who she is. It's your fault for not knowing it.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Obama.

I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.

Martin Luther King Jr.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Election Night Liveblog



11:00pm: Obama. Has. Won.

10:10pm: It's now mathematically impossible for John McCain to win this election. The west coast will push Obama over the top at 11:00pm when their polls close.

9:35pm: CNN has called Ohio for Obama. This thing's over. Barack Obama is going to be the next President of the United States.

9:20pm: Several red states have been called: Georgia (15), Arkansas (6), Kansas, (6), Oklahoma (7) and West Virginia (5).

9:00pm: It's the 9pm blitz! Obama: Rhode Island (4), Michigan (17), Wisconsin (10), Minnesota (10), New York (31). McCain: Wyoming (3), North Dakota (3).

174/49


8:55pm: Alabama (9) goes to McCain.

8:50pm: Kay Hagen has defeated Elizabeth Dole for the U.S. Senate in North Carolina. Another huge pickup for the Dems in the Senate race.

8:40pm: CNN has called Pennsylvania (21) for Obama. This is a huge win for the Blues. This win makes McCains road to 270 considerably more difficult.

8:30pm: New Hampshire (4) for Obama. CNN is navigating the most complicated voter categorization setup I've ever seen.



8:20pm: Several Senate seats have been called, but no pickups beyond Virginia. The Senate numbers are up to 45/29.

8:05pm: MSNBC has called Pennsylvania (21) for Obama. CNN just announced that they don't have enough information to call PA yet.

8:00pm: The big 8pm projection blitz! Obama: Massachusetts (12), Illinois (21), Connecticut (7), New Jersey (15), Maine (4), Delaware (3), Maryland (10), DC (3). McCain: Oklahoma (7), Tennessee (11).

Running tally: Obama: 77 McCain 34

7:55pm: 15 states and the District close in five minutes. Every time Campbell Brown speaks, she warns us not to pay any attention to what she's saying cuz it's too early. 2000 and 2004 scared the &#%$ out of the news networks.

7:50pm: FOX and CBS have called West Virginia (5) for McCain, MSNBC is calling South Carolina (8) for McCain. The national popular vote favors Obama 54% to 46% with just under 4 Million votes reported.

7:45pm: Pictures from Grant Park in Chicago are amazing. Obama is holding a rally there tonight where he will either accept the concession of John McCain, or concede himself in the event of an upset. The numbers are expected to top 1,000,000 people there tonight. There are tens of thousands of there already.

7:30pm: North Carolina, West Virginia and Ohio are now closed. None have been projected. Indiana's numbers are coming in, and the county-by-county map is fascinating. In 2004, John Kerry carried just four counties in the state - Monroe, Marion, Lake and LaPorte. The map tonight has Obama leading in 11 counties already and the numbers are very tight - shifting back and forth between the candidates as the numbers roll in. It should be noted that Lake County, IN, which is suburban Chicago, has not yet reported. Lake County is expected to go strong for Obama.

Governor Mitch Daniels (R) of Indiana has been called as the winner in the governor's race there. Mark Warner (D) has also been called as the winner in the Virginia senate race which marks the first pickup for the Dems in the Senate.

7:15pm: CNN just "beamed" Jessica Yellin in from Chicago and stood her image there in New York like something out of Star Trek. Wolf Blitzer will hereon be referred to as "Captain Wolf".

7:00pm: CNN has called Vermont (3) for Obama and Kentucky (8) for McCain. Polls have also closed in Georgia, South Carolina, Virginia, New Hampshire, the portion of Florida in the eastern time zone, and the rest of Indiana.

6:30pm: Good evening from Times headquarters in Grand Rapids, Michigan! We've been following the developments throughout the day and the big story everywhere is turnout. All across the country the lines have been long, but the voters appear generally good-spirited while they wait upwards of four or five hours in some places to cast their ballots.

The polls have closed in parts of Indiana and Kentucky. The areas of both states that are in the central time zone of those two states close at 7:00pm. Some numbers have rolled in from both Indiana and Kentucky at the time of this writing. With approximately 1% of precincts reporting, Obama holds a tight lead in Indiana and trails McCain in Kentucky. These numbers mean essentially nothing, however, especially in Indiana where suburban Chicago counties fall in the Central Time zone.

We've been watching CNN's high-definition coverage. Thankfully there's no EKG reading on the bottom of the screen telling me what 30 lunkheads in the Midwest think about the election results. They do, however, have about 65 pundits all crammed together with laptops at several different round tables.

James Carville is one of the most comical men I've ever seen.

The night rolls onward.

The final projections from FiveThirtyEight.com are showing Obama with a landslide victory on the electoral college at 348.6 to McCain's 189.4. They are also projecting Obama's likelihood of an overall win at 98.9%. This is all good news for those of us that suffered the results of the last two general elections.

So far it seems as though the major networks are being very cautious in their use of the "exit poll" data. This is good.

Wolf Blitzer is talking to a holographic lady in the "Election Center." Most of the nation can't seem to figure out how to run voting precincts with any efficiency, and Blitzer's talking to a freakin' hologram.

Monday, November 3, 2008

T-Minus...

I...know that from years of Corporatists and fundamentalists turning the word "liberal" into a code word for gays and hippies and commies you think that blue staters all want to corrupt our country and have people marrying dogs and smoking crack and burning Christmas trees. Here's the real truth we're pretty much just like you. We really, truly are.

-Adam McKay


With the exception of Sarah Palin. Oh...and that cat who dressed up like Lincoln at the RNCC. We're nothing like those crackheads. Seriously.





It's almost over.

The 2008 presidential election that started in 2006 comes to a conclusion tomorrow when, over the course of 19 hours, Americans from Maine to Hawaii will be casting their votes for United States President as well as scores of other federal, state and local leaders. We'll also be voting on a variety of propositions ranging from gay marriage to stem cell research to the fair treatment of farm animals.

It's a pretty important day.



Brack Obama will be in Chicago, Illinois, John McCain will be in Phoenix, Arizona, Joe Biden will be in Wilmington, Delaware and Sarah Palin will be in Wasilla, Alaska. All will be voting in their home districts. Obama has a rally scheduled at Grant Park in Chicago Tuesday night and John McCain has a scheduled event at the Biltmore Hotel in Phoenix. McCain has announced, however, that he will not be addressing the crowd in person, but will be making a statement to the press at an undisclosed location outside the Biltmore at some point Tuesday night. Obama has announced that he will speak directly to his supporters in Grant Park.

All national polls show Obama with a sizable lead, all with the exception of one are beyond the margin of error. John McCain will have to turn several states that are leaning hard blue to his side in order to win the general election.

FiveThirtyEight.com has everything you need to know about the national poll numbers.

I'll be liveblogging throughout the night, starting at 7:00pm when the polls close in Virginia, Georgia, parts of New Hampshire and the portion of Florida that is in the eastern time zone. The portions of Indiana and Kentucky that are in the eastern time zone close at 6:00pm, but I don't expect too much information to come out of those states until the polls close statewide at 7:00pm.

Get some sleep tonight, friends. It's going to be a long day tomorrow.